Engagement: Yes or No?
I was never the girl who started planning her wedding when she was 13 years old. Fantasizing about decorations, cakes and invitations was just never my thing. I don’t have a scrapbook full of magazine cut outs for dress ideas; hell, I barely have a Pinterest wedding board. The only reason I do is because I came across some really pretty diamond rings one time.
Recently, though, I’ve been feeling what I’m describing as the “engagement itch.”
Trevor, my lovely boyfriend, and I have been together for just over a year and a half and suddenly I have found myself looking at engagement rings and pretty, outdoor, forest-like ceremony locations. What!?
Now, I know that a lot of those feelings come from being with someone who I truly love and see myself with for the rest of my life, and it is so great to feel that way, but I don’t think it automatically means we’re ready for marriage. I had to reel myself in and ask, am I ready to be engaged? My answer was no, but that doesn’t mean I won’t be someday.
Many women (and maybe some men) have probably fallen victim to the engagement itch. It’s like a virus that you only feel a little bit at first, like a tickle in your throat at the beginning of a cold. Then, before you know it, you’ve bought a wedding dress without a proposal. This is why it’s important to catch it early.
The itch is contagious and airborne around engaged friends and family, or when people start asking you every other day when you’re going to take the plunge. I don’t think anyone really means to put that pressure on couples. I know I’ve asked my friends that question before, but it ignites a feeling that it might be “time.” Then you start thinking, well, I am 23. Apparently someone made a rule we should start feeling bad about our life choices after a certain age (23).
So, my wisdom and insight when it comes to this itch, is to not necessarily ignore it, but cautiously scratch it, maybe a gentle rub.
Take the time to think about how it makes you feel and why you feel that way. Do you think you should be engaged because your friends are? Or maybe because you’ve been in the same relationship for longer than any other one you’ve had? Because you’re 23 and drying up? Or, just maybe, it’s because you truly feel ready to walk down the aisle and say I do.